Breaking Free From Societal Conditioning

When I got sober almost 10 years ago, one of the very first things I did was rewrite the story of how I wanted to live. To this day, it astonishes me how many beliefs I’ve adopted throughout my life that weren’t even mine.

The overwhelming majority of them were inherited. I used to think it was just the way life is, which caused me to succumb to a fate that wasn’t meant for me.

Our stories aren’t really ours, at least, not until we sit with ourselves and take the time to learn who we are, what we want out of life, how we want to show up, who we want to be, and what makes our inner fire burn. Our stories were created by others and repeated enough times that it’s become who we are and how we live.

Let’s take our work weeks as an example. The 5 day, 9-to-5, 40-hour work week was introduced by Henry Ford in 1926. But it was to benefit himself, because if his workers had more time off, they could purchase his cars. (In 1938, it was passed into law for all industries.)

In just 100 years, we’ve been conditioned to think that a real job is clocking in for someone else, getting a 401k plan, maybe even an IRA, having stock options, health benefits, PTO, sick days, etc.

Don’t get me wrong, those are amazing benefits. But, at what cost- to build someone else’s dream instead of your own? To regret at the end of your journey the chances you didn’t take on yourself? To live life wondering, “what if?”

And when we dare to question the status quo, well, people don’t take too kindly to someone who wants to take the road less traveled. Because God forbid, you fall out of lockstep.

Question your reality. Is it really yours or is it what you’ve been conditioned to think it should be? Are your dreams really yours or are they what you’ve been told they should be? Is your life your definition of success or is it someone else’s definition of success?

If your dream is to be a songwriter, what’s stopping you? Not having a “real” job? You’re the one so many of us turn to when we don’t know how to speak our emotions. That’s as real as it gets.

If your dream is to be an entrepreneur, what’s stopping you? Is it capital and time? Those are real concerns. But, isn’t real freedom the peace you feel in your heart when you blaze your own trails?

If your dream is to drive around the country, living in a van, what’s stopping you? Not knowing how you’re going to fund your lifestyle? Sometimes the best ideas come when we decide we’ll figure it out as we go.

The point is that you can pursue your dreams. You just have to find solutions instead of seeing the obstacles you’ve been conditioned to worry about.

So try something different. Think a different thought today. Just one thought is all it takes. Then repeat that thought. Over and over. That thought will eventually become a belief.

Choose the life you want to live for yourself, not the life you’ve been told is yours. You’ll never make the wrong decision when you choose yourself.

I’ll see you soon…in the meantime, love yourself so much that even a Hallmark Christmas movie would be jealous.