Inner peace is like working out- we have to keep exercising our muscles until we get fit and toned. But we don’t stop when we achieve our goal. We keep exercising to maintain everything we’ve worked for.
In the beginning, we may not like it, but our motivation is knowing the results will be worth it. It gets to a point that we love exercising because it makes us feel good about ourselves.
So, if you’re struggling to find and maintain inner peace in sobriety, just know that you will get there. You just need to make a few adjustments to what you’re probably already doing. I’m going to share with you what’s helped me in my sober journey.
FINDING INNER PEACE
THE COMPANY YOU KEEP
Our heart has an electromagnetic field that’s 60 times greater in amplitude than the brain and 100 times stronger than the brain. That field extends about 3 feet outside of our physical bodies. So what we’re feeling can influence someone else’s behavior and vice versa.
We’re responsible for how we feel, but that also means the company we keep. If we’re around people who don’t make us feel good about ourselves, it’s only going to keep us stuck. Pay attention to who’s in your inner circle and even those you see occasionally.
Some things you may want to consider:
- Are they always gossiping about other people?
- Do you feel depleted after every or most interactions with them?
- Are they consistently the perpetual victims of life?
- Do they have to be the center of attention at all costs?
- Do they show interest in you, your life, your wellbeing?
I can’t tell you to cut ties with anyone. But what I will say is that when you notice that a person is continuously repeating the same toxic behaviors, those patterns stay until a person decides to change.
DEVELOP SPIRITUAL PRACTICES
We don’t have to sit in meditation for six hours a day and alienate ourselves from the world. Because if we’re only focused on keeping to ourselves, we may actually just be avoiding triggers and not growing.
We just have to be aware of what’s going on within so we react differently to outside influences or even our own thoughts. Dedicate however much time you have per day or every few days or even on a weekly basis to commit to your inner journey. Even a few minutes of morning rituals will make such a big difference. If you prefer the nighttime, you can do a few quick rituals then too.
IT’S A STATE OF BEING
Instead of feeling at peace, we chase it. What we need to do is to feel into it. Because peace is within us, not outside of us. No amount of love from people, work promotions, or material possessions are going to give us peace if we don’t feel it within ourselves first.
They’ll give us a sense of security. But security doesn’t mean peace, especially if you’re accustomed to a false sense of it or you’ve had your stability threatened in the past. So find it within yourself and everything else will naturally come into alignment.
MAINTAINING INNER PEACE
The following are simple and helped me so much. It also took me years before I found a routine that worked for me. Here’s the really obvious that’s not so obvious trick: Don’t do what you “should” be doing. Do what makes you feel good for as long as it makes you feel good. The moment something doesn’t feel good, take a break. Come back to it when you’re ready.
The whole point of healing is to enjoy ourselves, not suffer anymore. So, the biggest priority is yourself and how you feel.
REDEFINE MEDITATION
Let your day become a meditation. We don’t have to sit with our eyes closed for x amount of time. But we do need silent moments. It’s in those moments of silence, we hear the whispers of our soul. Become present in your day- the thoughts that arise, the way you feel when you’re around certain people, how you speak to yourself. Meditation can also be when you’re doing the dishes, going for a walk, engaging in a hobby- it’s anything you want it to be.
WRITING
I find journaling throughout the day helps me to connect more with myself than setting a dedicated time for writing. It’s also become more meaningful because I’m not forcing myself to write, I’m inspired to reflect. When you read/hear something that resonates, when you get a download or epiphany, pull a daily tarot card- take a few minutes to write down your thoughts and what it means to you. It helps to connect with yourself on deeper level and learn who you are.
GRATITUDE
Throughout the day, thank your spirit guides for being there for you. Thank yourself for showing up for yourself. Tell your partner/kids/pets how much you love them. It isn’t about having a gratitude practice, it’s about a feeling. When you begin to embody gratitude instead of writing it down, inner peace becomes who you are.
CONNECT TO YOUR HEART
Whenever you get a chance during the day, come back to your heart space. Place one hand there and feel the connection to your heart. You can ask your heart a question, you can feel gratitude or love, or you can just enjoy a quiet moment to yourself.
STEP INTO KNOWING
Go beyond, “if I don’t love myself, who else will?” Step into the energy of KNOWING you deserve your own love. You can step into that energy by connecting with your heart. It already knows you deserve your own love. Feel into that. Purge everything that disconnects you from your heart- the negative self-talk, the impulsiveness (buying from a place of FOMO or quick to react instead of responding), allowing others to define your wants and successes. Listen to yourself. Trust yourself enough to know that you can pave your own way.
I’ll see you soon…in the meantime, love yourself so much that even a Hallmark Christmas movie would be jealous.