Part of life means there are going to be moments we don’t want to deal with. The old version of ourselves, and maybe even our present selves, ignore, run away, repress, or find some other unhealthy way to escape.
But we aren’t those versions of ourselves anymore, or at least, trying not to be that version. So, we need to start acting differently, which isn’t always easy, especially when these programs are so deeply ingrained in us.
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Most of the time, we’re not even fully cognizant of our patterns. And when we become aware, it’s not like we can turn a switch on or off. We have to consistently repeat the same thoughts and behaviors until it becomes who we are.
Maybe you’ve even tried changing those patterns but gave up in frustration. I’ve done it plenty of times too.
Try something different. Make it easier and simpler by changing your patterns through your elevated self. Imagine how you want to respond during the tough times.
If you don’t know how you want to react when something comes up, you know it’s not how you’re currently acting. It can be to stay silent when someone’s attacking your character instead of being so quick to defend yourself. Or maybe when things aren’t working out the way you hoped they would, instead of panicking and jumping to conclusions, take deep breaths.
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On a side note- deep breathing will help to activate your parasympathetic nervous system, taking you out of survival mode. So, it’s a really great tool to have for any situation.
It may seem counterproductive that imagining scenarios we’d rather not experience helps us to evolve, but we’re not doing this to break our own hearts by imagining worst case scenarios. We’re also not doing this from a place of self-sabotage so we can run away before we get hurt.
We’re doing this so that we can start acting from the embodied state of who we want to become- the versions that confront their fears and insecurities head on.
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Take the time to think about how the healed version of yourself shows up during the tough times. You can ask yourself the following questions if you’d like:
The future you when they’re stressed:
- What would the healed version of yourself do in a challenging situation?
- How would they respond to people who disrespect them?
- What are their coping mechanisms?
- What do they do to lift themselves out of a funk?
Remember- breaking the cycle of being the old version of you takes time, so be patient and understanding with yourself. You’re not always going to react the way you hope to. When that happens, take a step back and acknowledge that there’s still a part of you that needs to be heard and healed.
I’ll see you soon…in the meantime, love yourself so much that even a Hallmark Christmas movie would be jealous.
