It’s all about how to rock your recovery with style and grace today. Because let’s face it. The last thing you’re feeling is sexy and empowered right now.
You’re not sure how you’re going to live your life as a sober person, let alone doing it with a je ne sais quoi.
I get it. I was once in your shoes. And when I sobered up almost five years ago, I had no emotional or professional support (physical, that is). So I relied solely on Divine faith to help me navigate the nuances of life in recovery.
That’s what brings me here- to help you out in this (lonely) journey.
We’ve all seen them- the women who possess an air of elegance and are so comfortable in their sobriety, that it makes us question, “What do I have to do to get there?”
It’s easy when you allow yourself to let go and take your sobriety in stride with humility. It takes doing so deep work on yourself.
The only way you’ll ever get to a place where you’re comfortable in your own skin is when you start unraveling the pieces of yourself you think are ugly, accept where you’re at in your journey, and decide one and for all, you don’t want to deal with the calamities of your mind. And I’ve got just the tips for you to get there.
Let’s get started on how to rock your recovery with style and grace, shall we?
Having gratitude for your trials and tribulations may be the absolute last thing on your mind, especially when you’re suffering an epic humiliation hangover, but it’s what’s going to help you turn day one into one year and so on.
And did I mention that grace is revealed in gratitude?
Gratitude is so much more than expressing thanks for everything you have in life. It’s about feeling grateful for everything you have and everything that’s going to come.
When you feel rather than mindlessly saying thanks, your aura changes. And people notice. Especially yourself. You feel lighter and freer.
The more you feel gratitude, the easier your sobriety journey becomes.
Allow yourself to be vulnerable
If you’re anything like me during the beginning stages of my sobriety journey, you’d rather be dead than be vulnerable. I can tell you from firsthand experience that it’s effective. Until it isn’t.
Being vulnerable takes a strength so powerful and courageous that those who are weak will undermine any attempt of showing the intimate parts of themselves.
You’ll never be the person you’re truly meant to be if you don’t allow yourself to show the bits and pieces of yourself that you have stored in the crevices of your psyche for fear of being hurt. And the only way that you’ll ever be the person you aspire to be is to show the parts of yourself you deem to be unworthy, unacceptable, unlovable.
I’m not gonna lie. You’ll get hurt because not everyone will accept you for who you are. But would you prefer your self-acceptance or someone else’s acceptance of you?
Besides, sobriety is a huge blessing in and itself. You’ve been given a second chance at life. So you might as well discard those who don’t accept you. And start embracing yourself through your vulnerabilities.
Rock your recovery with style & grace through simplicity
Life is difficult. Sobriety doesn’t have to be. It’s only as complicated as you allow it.
Which is why simplifying things will go such a long way in your sobriety journey.
It’s not about overthinking until you reach a peak of anxiety. Or engaging in arguments because someone said something you misconstrued. Or wallowing in shame and humiliation.
Navigating sobriety is f*cking scary. It’s easy to get overwhelmed with feelings of uncertainty. And when insecurities surface, you can’t help but allow your mind to travel into territory that just isn’t worth exploring.
The more you allow yourself to indulge in the frivolity, the more it becomes your life. And the last thing you want is a life filled with unnecessary drama.
This is your moment to create a new and improved version of yourself. So do you want to be the unpredictable train wreck or do you want to be the compassionate person who knows how to rock their recovery with style and grace?
I’m pretty sure you chose the latter.
It’s so much easier to make things more difficult because life during your drinking days was filled with drama and turmoil, that it’s going to take time to get acclimated to a new you and a new lifestyle. But if you can do just one thing today to make your life simpler, do it.
Whether it’s crossing off one thing on your to do list, or getting your coffee machine set up and ready to go for tomorrow morning, or picking up a book when your mind starts to venture into darkness, do it.
You’re going to have uncomfortable moments. This is life. Sober or not.
What you want is to be okay with being in stillness and discomfort because when you get there, life becomes much easier and worth living. And when that happens, you’ve found simplicity.
Don’t treat sobriety as your life. Create a lifestyle around your sobriety.
Sobriety is so much more than saying sayonara to the booze. It’s about finding yourself, growing and evolving, and cultivating a loving relationship with yourself.
That won’t happen if you revolve your life around sobriety. Because life has so much more to offer than remaining abstinent and you won’t live your life to the fullest if you’re treating sobriety as if it’s your life.
Instead, create a lifestyle around your sobriety.
I’ll give you an example. I love yoga, meditation, reading, tea, reading, and recently learned to knit. So I’ve created a lifestyle around my passions.
I have my “me time,” a reading nook in my home, everything is decorated in the style I love, and I live my life according to what I enjoy doing. NOT by focusing on my sobriety.
I’ve relapsed so many times and I can tell you that each relapse was a result of me only focusing on my sobriety. I wasn’t taking the time to do the inner work, didn’t find new hobbies, and tried so hard to be sober.
But when I finally sobered up for good nearly five years ago, I told myself that I wasn’t going to place any emphasis on my sobriety. Instead, I was going to become the love of my life.
And that required a lot of work on myself and still does. But I can tell you that my life has been a hell of a lot more rewarding by choosing to create a lifestyle around my sobriety rather than devoting my life to sobriety.
Sobriety doesn’t define me because it isn’t who I am. Just as you’re so much more than a sober person.
If you were to make a list of characteristics and traits about yourself right now, sober wouldn’t be on that list. Because it isn’t you. It’s something you choose to do because you recognized the toxicity of your life when you were drinking.
Being sober is only a part of who you are based on an action you took. Not the whole facet of yourself.
If you create a lifestyle around your sobriety rather than revolving your entire life around sobriety, your journey becomes more fluid.
Step into the unknown with childlike innocence
A plethora of fears surfaced for me when I first got sober. As I’m pretty sure it has for you too.
It’s so easy to get caught up in those fears. The problem with that is you miss out on so much when you’re not relishing uncertainty.
And believe me- I was a hardcore impatient and petulant control freak so it was difficult for me to surrender and allow myself to go with the flow. But when I finally decided to allow the Universe to steer me in the right direction, my fears dissipated and sobriety became easy.
When you possess the carefree innocence of a child, you develop a passion for living again. One you didn’t know existed. You explore and experiment with things you were once too scared of doing or lacked the confidence to pursue.
And really…if you want to rock your recovery with style and grace, you can’t exactly be uptight and rigid. You have to relearn to be a kid again.
Let me be clear. I’m not talking about being immature. But rather possessing the emotional intelligence to be as free spirited as you were as a child.
Remember when you were a kid and you would be so happy to be playing in a cardboard box or go for something because you’re mind didn’t tell you you couldn’t do it, were too stupid to do it, or weren’t good enough to pursue something?
If you want to rock your recovery with style and grace, that’s the headspace you want to get into again.
Because being fearless, NOT reckless, takes a level of trust in yourself to walk the path of sobriety with confidence.
While you won’t be confident every minute of every day, you can learn to dismiss the negative self-talk and exude that carefree, light hearted energy.
There you have it. How to rock your recovery with style and grace.
How do you navigate your sobriety journey and ease the process? Let me know in the comments below.
If you know anyone who can benefit from this, please be sure to share it with them.
Thanks so much for reading this and see ya soon!